Don't eat the yellow snow: December 2002

Considering it is the last day of this year, I thought some quiet reflection was a good idea. Here you go, the year summarised. Anything anyone wants me to add?

NICKS 2002 Summary
JANUARY:
-Took the annual pilgrimage to Middleton, had some crazy fun, met a chick with one arm
-Turned 16
-Prepared myself mentally for Year 11 IB
-Began Year 11
FEBRUARY
-Went to the Skyshow.
-Had some random guys yell “I DON’T SEE YOUR FRENCH STICK” at us from a car
-Had a small nervous breakdown with regards to the IB workload
-Got wasted at Erika and Elsebeth’s party and thought I was spiderman.
-Got my Learners Permit
-Caused some havoc on the roads
-Started going out with Lauren
-Sam and Julia get together
-After some chaos, Howie and Hannah get together
MARCH
-Knuckled down on the schoolwork
-Sat my first Year 12 Economic mock exam and nearly died
-Was offered sex by a neighbor
APRIL
-Thanked all conceivable Gods and Goddesses that I had survived first term
-Attended a rocking 16th party for Hannah
-Bought Hannah a Siamese fighting fish for her birthday. Named Mr. Swishy
-Pissed away two weeks of holidays
MAY
-Trudged back to school
-Began the infamous Group Four project.
-Celebrated a whole pile of birthdays
-Celebrated Lauren’s Birthday
-Long Hair Competition begins, Sam, Daw and Tim vow not to get haircuts
JUNE
-Did a whole bunch of stuff
-Studied (Laughs) for mid year exams.
-Sat mid-year exams, did surprisingly well considering the amount of “study” I did
-Took a Kick-ass trip to Nepabunna aboriginal community for a week, Had a blast.
-Got swindled out of an academic award due to administrative difficulty.
-Broke up with Lauren
JULY
-Watched Group Four due date fly past
-Received Optical Enhancement (Got Nerd Glasses, Sigh)
-Back to school again
-Sam and Julia call it quits.
-Sam and I drown our sorrows, going shot for shot at his kitchen counter till Sam puked, then going some more.
-Got buried under a pile of work
AUGUST
-Got my Provisional License
-Went to retreat at Nunyara
-Sam almost died from alcohol abuse, he thought a light was a person.
-Long hair competition ends, Sam, Daw and Tim get haircuts
-Uh, did some other stuff I guess.
SEPTEMBER
-Watched the September 11 special presentations, saw video footage of the incident for the first time
-Finished the Group Four project, nearly
-Celebrated Randell’s and Francesca’s Birthdays in style at the house of the Dutch man.
-Sam and Emma hook up (Finally)
-Nic and Tim get back together and the world is right again
-Term three ends
-Grand final day, Laugh as Daw loses his puke virginity and ralphs for the first time.
OCTOBER
-Shat myself, realizing I know nothing about Economics, and have a Stage 2 Exam in less than a month
-Procrastinated about studying.
-Accepted that I would probably fail
-Was mildly irritated that Australians have become a terrorist target after the October 12 incident.
-Celebrated my cousin’s 21st
-Handed up Group Four Project nearly three months late, Got a 6 anyway.
NOVEMBER
-Crammed 18 hours of study into three days
-Sat the IB Stage 2 Economics exam
-Started this Blog
-Passed my Distinction lifesaving award.
-Sat end of year exams, Kicked in most of them
-“Finished” school
-Got the dog
-Went to Leadership camp
DECEMBER
-Emma scores a 17\20 for her Year 12 SACE French Exam
-Returned to school for more punishment with IB related matters (Extended Essay and associated bullshit)
-Launched IBimperium.tk
-Against all advice, Daw blondes his hair and gets an earring
-Random guy leans out of car to hit on Daw, obviously impressed by his new fag look.
-Sat around watching daytime TV
-Celebrated Christmas with family

I am driving up 85 in the
kind of morning that lasts all afternoon
I’m just stuck inside the gloom

4 more exits to my apartment but
I am tempted to keep the car in drive
and leave it all behind

cause I wonder sometimes
about the outcome
Of a still verdictless life
am I living it right
am I living it right
am I living it right
why, why Georgia, why

I rent a room and I fill the spaces with
wood in places to make it feel like home
but all I feel’s alone

it might be a quarter-life crisis
or just the stirring in my soul
either way

I wonder sometimes
about the outcome
of a still verdictless life
am I living it right
am I living it right
am I living it right
why, why Georgia, why

so what so I’ve got a smile on
It’s hiding the quiet superstitions in my head

don’t believe me
don’t believe me
when I say I’ve got it down

everybody is just a stranger
but that’s the danger in going my own way
I guess it’s a price I have to pay
still "everything happens for a reason"
is no reason not to ask myself
if I'm living it right

am I living it right
am I living it right
why, why Georgia, why

_-John Mayer "Why Georgia"

Its been a while since I have posted Lyrics. This song is cool anyway.

Well, I'm back. I have put in over six hundred Kilometers behind the wheel in four days, with about five hundred of them breaking the law. Mainly because traveling 120kmph on the state freeway not only contravenes the terms of my provisional license but also road safety laws. Had some fun though. My family is occasionally cool. After the four and a bit hour drive we pulled up at the ranch on my uncles farm. He owns 400 acres between Millicent and Mount Gambier. They have a nice house. Big, old, wooden, roomy and a warm farmhouse kitchen, which is well supplied with numerous baked treats courtesy of my Aunt Grace. Seriously, the first thing she said to me when I walked in the door was “Well, you are here just in time for the meringues, but you are going to have to wait for the shortbread and the fruitcake”. She had been up since 7am baking. About the point we had sat down for coffee and cookies, Uncle Milton stomps his way in, kicks off his work boots, takes off his akubra and brushes the dust from the same work shirt that he has been wearing for the last 10 or so years. He says G’day, barely sits down before asking “So, NJ (My family calls me NJ, Don’t ask), You going to help me with these calves?” . See, Milton lives out on a farm, with his wife, his two daughters and the old farm dog, Sam. The closest relatives that live in Mount Gambier are my other Aunt and Uncle, and their two girls. Therefore, as the only young male relative within 450 K’s, he treats me as sort of a son. I learnt a lot of cool stuff from Milton over the years, How to ride an Ag bike, how to shoot properly, ways to treat cows and sheep, how to deal with chickens, how to service a tractor. Anyway, this year I helped him with his calves, feeding them and what not, I also helped to clear some of the rabbits and feral cats away with the old .22. (Haven’t shot in two years, and I can still do it decently). After the farm work is done, there is always cold beer in the bar fridge in the shed. Saturday night we had a massive dinner at the local Chinese. There is something comforting about walking in and having the manager address my grandmother by name, as well as all the waitresses calling her “grandma”. Dinner was somewhere over $300, but the manager gave us a discount (cause we are special) and it was Grandma’s shout. Drove back at nighttime Sunday, got in at about 11pm. Plans for New Years still aren’t organized. Sigh

Also, A big happy birthday to Emma! It's cool to have a birthday the day after Jesus, Emma! I wish my birthday was the day after Jesus had his birthday. Sorry I can't be there, but you have yourself a great day.

Well, in about 15 minutes I am off to Mount Gambier for a few days. This means that chances are my blog will not be updated for a while. (*Shocked Gasp from Readers*) but relax, where possible I will try and update, and failing that I will just fill in the blank days from my journal when I get back. You guys will live.

Compliments and Criticisms of the Blog

Merry Christmas says:I like your journal its amusing
Merry Christmas says: by the way..is sex really counted as a hobby?
Snowman says: yes, its like collecting baseball cards, except you collect sexual partners

In about 10 hours, I get in my car, start it up and drive to Mount Gambier to visit Dad's family. Mum and my sister are staying home for this one, so it is just me and dad in a car for five hours. It should be interesting. Mum was abusing me because everything I packed fits into a small backpack. So sue me for traveling light. At most we are there for 6 days, I have packed enough, and if a problem arises I can just wash my clothes while I am down there. As a note boys, I stuck to the standard formula for packing. 2 standard issue guy tee shirts, one pair of pants, one shorts, one pair of thongs, one pair of shoes. It is the only way to fly.

Hey hey, hope you people had a great day. But its towards the end of it now, my family have dispersed themselves over the house and are sleeping off their turkey, wine and Christmas pudding except for my mum and Aunt who are laughing in the living room at something hysterical (but the vat of wine they consumed between them may have something to do with that). I hope that the jolly fat man brought you everything that you asked for and that you had a happy and relaxing holiday.
As far as I am concerned, I fared fairly well, besides the phone from my parents, I was given...
-Some cool Armani cologne.
-A new pair of shoes
-Some clothes
-A decent shaver
-Some books, Second chance by James Patterson, The beach house by James Patterson, Prey by Michael Crichton
-A $25 CD voucher
-Set of Binoculars
-“Room For Squares” John Mayer (that’s right, he has more songs than just “No such thing”)
-Some funky Dave Matthews band CD’s that my cousin brought back from the US
-The movie classic “The Great Escape” on DVD.

And a big fat merry Christmas to you all!
I hope you were all good boys and girls and that Santa brought you whatever it is you wanted on this most festive of holidays. Have a great day kids.

Its hard to describe the way church makes me feel. I go to real church (as oppose to school church) twice a year, at Easter and Christmas, and both times, it makes me feel strange. A mixture of things really, for most part anger and sadness. Every time I look at a congregations of people like that, I get mad at the way they have been brainwashed. There is a line in the mass, where the priest says "We give thanks and praise" and the whole lot of them respond in that dull monotone with "It is RIGHT to give our thanks and praise". Who are these people to say what is right and wrong? It really makes me angry, and sad that these people have allowed themselves to be taken advantage of like this.

She was his girl, he was her boy-friend,
Soon be his wife, and make him her husband.
A suprise on the way, anyday anyday
One healthy little gigglin', dribblin', baby boy.
The wise men came, three made their way,
To shower him with love, while he lay in the hay.

Shower him with Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love was all around

Not very much of his childhood was known,
kept his mother Mary worried, always out on his own.
He met another Mary, who, for a reasonable fee,
less than reputable was known to be.

His heart was full of Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love was all around

When Jesus Christ was nailed to his tree,
He said, "Oh daddy-o. I can see how it all soon will be"
I came to shed a little light on this darkening scene,
Instead I fear I've spilled, the blood of my children all around
the blood of my children all around,
the blood of my children's all around

So I'm told or so the story goes,
the people he knew were less than golden-hearted.
Gamblers and robbers; Drinkers and jokers,
all soul searchers, like you and me, like you and me.
Rumors insisted he soon would be,
for his deviations, taken into custody.
By the authorities, less informed than he.
Drinkers and jokers, all soul searchers

Searchin for Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love is all around

Preperations were made for his celebration day.
He said, "Eat this bread and think of it as me,
Drink this wine and dream it will be
the blood of our children all around
the of our children's all around,
The blood of our children's all around
Father up above,
Why in all this hatred do you fill me up with
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love is all around
Father up above
Why in all this anger do you fill me up wtih love
Fill me - Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love, Love
Love, Love...And the blood of our children's all around.
-The Christmas Song, Dave Matthews Band.

Seemed appropriate, Merry Christmas

Last night I had my first leftover sandwich for the season. This is a big thing for me, as every year, Mum always cooks way too much food and then leaves piles and piles of leftovers in the fridge, its become tradition to make sandwiches out of anything you can. Last night, they had guests, so when I got home from Emma’s there were plenty of leftover cold cuts in the fridge. Hooray for leftovers!

I got a new phone. Sort of an un-official christmas present. Nokia 8250, blue screen, very sexy. I'm pretty happy with that.

An alcoholics Christmas carol

On the first day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, A stollie lemon ruski

On the second day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, Two cans of Fosters and a stollie lemon ruski

On the third day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, Three Rum and Cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon Ruski.

On the fourth day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, Four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski

On the fifth day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, Five UDL’s, four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski.

On the sixth day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, Six fingers of bourbon, Five UDL’s, four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski.

On the Seventh day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, seven gin martinis, Six fingers of bourbon, Five UDL’s, four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski.

On the Eighth day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, Eight shots of vodka, seven gin martinis, Six fingers of bourbon, Five UDL’s, four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski

On the Ninth day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, nine snifters of brandy, Eight shots of vodka, seven gin martinis, Six fingers of bourbon, Five UDL’s, four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski

On the tenth day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, ten casks of white wine, nine snifters of brandy, Eight shots of vodka, seven gin martinis, Six fingers of bourbon, Five UDL’s, four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski

On the Eleventh day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, Eleven cans of guiness, ten casks of white wine, nine snifters of brandy, Eight shots of vodka, seven gin martinis, Six fingers of bourbon, Five UDL’s, four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski

On the Twelfth day of Christmas, the bottleo gave to me, Twelve kegs of beer, Eleven cans of guiness, ten casks of white wine, nine snifters of brandy, Eight shots of vodka, seven gin martinis, Six fingers of bourbon, Five UDL’s, four vodka cruisers, three rum and cokes, two cans of Fosters and a Stollie lemon ruski

More evidence of my bastard-like qualities. Identities have been changed to protect the innocent.

Random Girl : Guess what? I am now a member of a Gym. That means that I am going to be thin and beautiful!
Me: Gym's only deal with fat, not ugly.
Random Girl: NICK! When you are healthy you emit a beautiful inner glow. .
Me: You better hope you glow pretty bright.

Quick lesson for you all. The purpose of a disclaimer is to inform of troubling news ahead, to warn if you will. The reason I put a disclaimer on my post on religion was so that, if easily offended by the topic you could skip over it and not be pissed off by it. However, if you choose to ignore the disclaimer and read it anyway, well it’s your own damn fault if you get offended, you were warned, don’t take it out on me.

Those who know me would know that I have had a M*A*S*H fetish for some time. So I almost creamed myself when I saw this link. . Not that the result really surprises me

I just wanna rock u! says :guess what my gorgeous sexy boyfriend did last nite?
Snowman says: uhh, can it be described under a PG rating?

Gee, I'm a bastard sometimes.

After yet another shopping trip to the money vortex they call Marion shopping center yesterday, I return embittered to the whole shopping experience. Have you ever stood back and watched people while shopping? At Christmas time especially, people scurry around like rats in a maze. Little consumer driven, product hungry rats in a big flashy maze. The mall comes alive, the hum of discussions blends with the wail of little children and music pumped from radios and over the PA system. This time of year, traditional carols meld themselves with re-mixes done to a flashy dance beat in an attempt to modernize the carol. Clothing stores deemed “too cool” to conform to tradition continue to pump out their “trendy” dance or techno music. The sounds add to each other and produce a headache inducing mix that is sickening at best. Inhale, and a cocktail of nauseating scents assault you straight out. Natural perfume and body product stores belch fruity scents out to mingle with the high-grade disinfectants, shoe polishes and the smell of fast foods wafting from the food court into some sort of strange Uber aroma, which is disgusting at best. Flashing red lights highlight the sales, conveniently looking like an emergency beacon, so paramedics can locate the unfortunate shoppers who have been trampled in the speedy migration of bargain hunters. Fairy lights adorn displays of “The perfect gifts”, like flickering bug zappers attempting to draw the unwary into range before shocking them. Star-crossed lovers mosey down the mall hand in hand, drinking in the Christmas spirit, drinking it in until they are drunk on the feeling. Their pupils dilate to take it all in and they look like some sort of junkie after a three-day session. Men hurry around into jewelry stores looking for a gift that will be as good and inoffensive to their female counterparts as possible. Braver specimens venture into clothing stores, boutiques and makeup stores, praying to all the Gods they know that they won’t put s foot wrong and wind up in the doghouse on Christmas day. The women run around to the sports shops and the like looking for a gift he will appreciate. Some spend tireless hours looking for a gift that has “meaning”, a meaning that will no doubt be overlooked by the hapless male and place him firmly in the doghouse again, leaving her sobbing about all the hours she wasted. Charity collectors guard the exits, armed with tin cans and a sickly smile, making it impossible to walk out past them without handing over all your spare change. Should you dare try and walk out without handing it over, you receive evil glares and a truckload of guilt to haul around for not helping the hungry, the poor or the weak in the Christmas season. Inside the smaller stores, bored shop assistants sit waiting, catlike, waiting to pounce on anything and anyone that walks in the door asking if they “need help” or if they’re “right there”. Should you make the mistake of saying that you do need assistance they affix themselves like leeches to your wallet and attempt to suck out as much as they can before you beat them off and run screaming from the store. Tinsel in multitudes of different colours adorns any surface that isn’t already crammed with tacky Christmassy decorations. Santas that start singing when you walk past, glowing reindeer, decorated trees, plastic candy canes, stuffed snowmen leaning on brooms that make me embarrassed to bear the nickname “Snowman”. Yet in the middle of it all it is impossible to not get into some sort of a Christmassy mood. I realise that the whole thing sounded a little cynical, don’t get me wrong here, Christmas and New years are my favorite times of year. However, every year it becomes a little less magical, and a little more hectic, a little more consumer driven and a little more forced. I hear on the news that each person spends an average of $450 odd dollars on presents, Good for the economy, yes. But it makes you wonder how much Christmas cheer is spread around, or if it is just money and material objects. If it is just material goods, well, we are slowly losing something good, pissing it away as we tend to do as humans.

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz, by Angel.

YAY! I'm a goth!. What do you people think?

Here's a comforting Christmas thought. Credit goes to Damo for sending this to me.
Does Santa exist?
There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 Million (according to the Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each. Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our Calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks.
This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second--3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour. The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them--Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000
tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch). 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance--this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip. Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,500 g's. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.
Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now. Merry Christmas.

Some people have WAY too much time on their hands.
Merry Christmas kids.

My apologies for yesterday's abundance of short thoughts at random intervals. I'm starting to lose the ability to concentrate on writing for long periods of time. Part of this is due to the fact I am up and down constantly doing stuff, going out, getting food, dealing with the dog etc. Part of it is the fact that since the holidays started, I have doubled or even tripled my fluid intake. Things only get worse from there. Also, what with this supposed heat (I don't feel temperature so it doesn't affect me) I have to prise myself up off the leather chair to prevent my skin from bonding with it. All excuses aside. I have also visited Marion every day this week. That alone is so sad I think I'm going to cry.

Does anyone here know the difference between erotic and kinky? Erotic is where you use a feather, Kinky is where you use the whole chicken.

I don't get this logic. Mum tells me to sweep away all the cobwebs outside. So like a trustworthy little automaton I do the job, only to have her complain about all the flies and bugs that came inside. . Curious

I was watching the midday movie. Around Christmas time they tend to put on all the wholesome Christmas stories that are meant to warm the cockles of your heart. However, today's movie is "Santa with muscles" featuring Hulk Hogan as Santa Claus. It's very alarming to watch.

To make things better, heres another random word from my big box of hard words.
VULPINE: To be a sly or foxy person.
Use it in conversation kids

The new layout is full of errors and problems. I'm sorry, I am a goon.I will fix them as soon as possible kids.

Just a quick note for the unwary, in the layout change, apparently some of the settings got screwed up and now the computer insists that the timezone I am in is the one that applies to Korea and Japan. (GMT+9:00). Therefore times on all of the posts are out by about half an hour, as my time zone (GMT +9:30) will not apply to the site clock. Sorry for the inconvenience.

It was time for a change. I know, I know, the colours hurt your eyes. Well, it was better than the boring old blue layout. This one is a little fresher and a little more “Nickish”. One day I will get off my ass and make my own damn template, and then re route it to my own damn webspace so I can add other cool stuff. Sometime soon kids, watch this space. Till then though looks like you will have to live with this one.

WARNING WARNING RELIGEOUS RANT APPROACHING.
I don’t want to really offend anyone so it would be a good idea that any priests, padres, nuns, salvation army workers or anyone who has a strong belief in major religions would not read this post. You have been warned.
In the following post I will present my views on major religions, and I don’t want tonnes and tonnes of hate mail. So I will make this statement. I don’t HATE religion. I don’t HATE religious people, some of my best friends are religious. This is just MY view on the topic. This doesn’t mean I want to change you, or dissuade you in any way, but please, take no offense.

Ok, now that that is out of the way I would like to share my thoughts. Today while shopping one of the shop assistants was wearing a little necklace with tiny blocks that spelt out WWJD. In my experience this means one of two things. It either stands for “What would Jesus do” which should be followed by a question mark, or “We want Jack Daniels” which should be followed by an exclamation point. (Judging by the look of this girl, it stood for the latter, but anyway). Me, in my ever-cynical mood would like to point out two points, now call me crazy (“you’re crazy Nick,” “Thanks Ty”) but one: Jesus would do nothing, because he is dead. Two: Jesus would do nothing because he is a mythical character in a storybook. The question is about as logical as asking “What would Santa do?” The answer of course being climb down a chimney scoff some cookies and drink some milk or “What would Tooth Fairy do?” Dress up in a tu-tu and steal teeth. So my answer the the WWJD question would be of course, “Walk around in a toga preaching and eating bread, wine, fish and call everyone brother”. Ok, ok , it is very cynical and bastard like of me but I have never had a good time with religion. The whole idea just didn’t sit right with me. For starters being free spirited I take an immediate dislike to anyone or thing that tries to inflict its beliefs on me (one particular teacher at my school does this to excess, for legal reasons I can’t name names). Secondly, I was forced into a lot of the religion side of things, which only made me hate it more. I think that to be truly religious sometimes you have to discover it for yourself. Another thing is the fact that I am left handed. What’s this you say? What’s has being left-handed got to do with anything? Well, the bible is the text that started the whole left side right site rivalry. The right side was always seen as good, when depicted God or Jesus is often shown blessing with the right hand, the devil however is always shown cursing with his left. There are several scripture passages that approve of the right side and denounce the left. Now I know this sounds flawed in the reading, but since medieval times left hander’s have been seen as evil, and one of the main reasons is the bible. Many early lefties were burned at the stake for being witches and warlocks. Joan of Arc, a noted lefty was also accused of being a witch, the left hand just clinched the deal. It sounds shallow, but my grandpa has told me stories of how when he was in school, his left hand was tied behind his back and he was beaten until he wrote with his left hand. So much so that now he rarely writes, and when he does his handwriting is illegible, because he will not use his left hand and is poor with his right. This is not an isolated case, this happened to thousands of lefties, and only now are the lines of discrimination being stamped out. So, after all the suffering that “my people” (namely lefties) have suffered at the hands of books such as the bible, I find it hard to accept. Sort of like handing a jewish person, or an ex German POW “Mein Kampf” and expecting them to accept it as their religion. Besides that I think that religion has caused more harm than good. In the late 1980’s, a man who had taken the scripture too far broke into a girls dorm and killed 7 girls, using an empty yoghurt container to drink their blood, believing that he would receive eternal life. History is dotted with them, the people who think they are the messiah and kill because they believe they are “judging” people. I find the whole thing somewhat hard to swallow, my fight with a nun when I was 12 years old is testament to this. She tried so hard, but I used logic and science to override faith. Two things that have never done me wrong, logic and science. All faith has given me is shattered hopes. Who knows, maybe someday I will embrace religion. If JC does appear at the end of the world I will be the first in line to repent and say I was wrong. However, until there is some sort of proof in the matter, I stand where I stand.
Now I know I go to a catholic school, and that is not a bad thing. No doubt when I have kids they too will go to a catholic school. I like the sense of community a school like that has. Its very binding and it makes life that little bit easier having friendly people around. It is doubtless again that my children will probably be raised with a similar religious background, you know the story of Easter, the story of Christmas, yadda yadda yadda, Mainly because these holidays are becoming too commercialized, and the sense of tradition behind them is being lost, also the sense of morality that the Christian religion specifically gives is a good basis for any child. Also, in times like these it gives people something to fall back on when tragedy strikes. I have other ways of dealing with tragedy, and have thus far come unaided by religion. I find that religion takes hold where reason and logic leave off, and that is not something I am willing to accept. Now, don’t think that I am an agnostic, or even an atheist. I think that both of these options are somewhat of a religion in themselves, mainly because it involves denying all religious aspects to life, which is not on. I fall into no category, (until of course I form my own religion), the song best describing my feelings on the subject is Powderfinger’s –“Whatever makes you happy”. Do whatever you want, be whatever you want, whatever makes you happy. My very dear friend Hannah, follows religion devoutly, it makes her happy, so I don’t question it. I am just happy to co-exist with everyone, without being pressured into some form of belief system. There are probably people out there who feel the same way. I don’t know. If its for you, then go for it. If its not, don’t argue, just live life. It’s a lot easier than arguing it out with people over the existence of God. There’s no proof in the matter, you could argue till you go blue in the face, its not going to persuade people. Devote those energies to something worthwhile.
That’s it from me for now.
Dasveedanya.

Footnote non Russian\ Ukrainian speakers: The irony of ending my rant with “Dasveedanya” will not be evident. Ask anyone who does speak the language, they will tell you it means goodbye. The literal translation is something closer to “Go with God”, It is an ultimately cool way to say goodbye to someone, preferably right before you kill them, then it would sound ultra, Über cool. In this case however I was just trying to be a prick, and probably succeeding.

Well, they say that you learn something new every day. Today I learnt three things
1)The difference between “Eu de Toilette” and “Aftershave”
2) Ways to break out of a German prison courtesy of “The Great Escape” (Including how to say “My god, Don’t shoot me” in German. P.S (it is something along the lines of “Ach de liber, Nek sheizen”)
3)To be a "Witzelsucht" is a person who attempts to ease tension by being funny. (From a handy box of “365 Really hard words” I got for Christmas 2 years ago.) I will post more as I see fit.

Just quickly, my mother has finally gotten over me drinking. We had friends up for drinks tonight. She poured me a glass of wine. If you knew how conservative my mum was you would know this is a big victory for me.

Today is boring, so I bring you song lyrics

Time is never time at all
You can never ever leave without leaving a piece of youth
And our lives are forever changed
We will never be the same
The more you change the less you feel

Believe, believe in me, believe
Believe that life can change
That you're not stuck in vain
We're not the same, we're different tonight
Tonight, so bright
Tonight

And you know you're never sure
But you're sure you could be right
If you held yourself up to the light
And the embers never fade in your city by the lake
The place where you were born

Believe, believe in me, believe
Believe in the resolute urgency of now
And if you believe there's not a chance tonight
Tonight, so bright
Tonight

We'll crucify the insincere tonight
We'll make things right, we'll feel it all tonight
We'll find a way to offer up the night tonight
The indescribable moments of your life tonight
The impossible is possible tonight
Believe in me as I believe in you, tonight

-The Smashing Pumpkins “Tonight Tonight”

I don't know why I posted this song. It is a rocking song and I do love it very much. Hope you all enjoy.

You also know its going to be a bad day if Bruce Willis jumps into your elevator barefoot and wearing a dirty tee shirt

You know its a bad day when you try to sprinkle creamed corn instead of chocolate topping over your ice cream

Another point I realised last night. You know you are an IB nerd when you are watching the fireworks and going. “I wonder how they are doing that chemically. .. They would be using something like strontium to make the reds, it would be an iodine to make the purples, would greens be copper? They could be. . Hmmm, the brighter ones would be magnesium or phosphorus
that my friends is scary scary stuff

Last night was pretty cool, carols are fun! There were fireworks and singing and people and whiney kids. Everything that makes a major outdoor event lots and lots of fun. Jokes aside it was kinda cool. I'm sure seeing Sam, Daw and myself singing “We three kings” is terrifying to behold, and to hear no doubt. Regardless, there are always some people who spoil it for everyone. So here is a list, people who spoilt the night for Nick.

The Smokers- Two really old smokey people who sat right in front of us and blew their second hand smoke back into our faces, despite loud conversations between me and Emma along the lines of “Isn’t smoking really bad?”, “Yes, I hear it causes lung cancer and you die’, some people will never learn

The Boot Scooter- I don’t know, but I really don’t like performance artists that refer to the crowd as a “Rootin’ tootin’ bootin’ scootin’ bunch of good timers”. Makes me think that she deserved to die.

The Children’s Performers – If I hear someone make the whole crowd scream out “ Where are you” or “Ho ho ho” again, I swear to all that is sacred I will hurt them. Enough said.

The puppeteer – The guy who stands outside the gate and expects me to give him money because he has a puppet that dances to Christmas carols.

The Charity collectors – Those cheery, smiling people who walk around with a big bucket that says something like “Feed the hungry” or “clothe the homeless” and make it nearly impossible to not give them money,. . . nearly impossible.

The “Security” – Its in little brackets because in reality the security are just big burly guys that have been given a yellow shirt and a walkie-talkie for the night. They have no authority.

The wanderer – Yes, this is the person that constantly tries to move their way through a crowd of sitting people. I got kicked in the head at least twice.

After the little bitch I decided to post things that definitely made the night a lot better.

Fireworks – I love ‘em, they are much fun. Specially the brightish ones. They rock my world

Banana Paddle pops – By far the bestest of the frozen ice cream treats. After they have been in an esky for almost 4 hours though they aren’t that great, but still good.

Emma, and her space Naziness. – Yes, I paid you out at the time Emma, but your rigid control over our little area was what made the night more comfortable for all. We had room to spread out and relax. That was some good work.

Random strangers that join our conversation- I was talking to Daw about the movie “Being John Malkovich”, and some random stranger just decided to join our conversation, Daw says she wanted him. , She was however, fairly hottish, and therefore would have some sort of taste.

Random Drunk guys that yell at us from cars- Some strange guy yelled at me and Daw. The guy had blonde hair. I think he wanted Daw. Daw’s new gay guy look is paying off.

McDonalds counter help that gives me attitude- Its so funny just because its so wrong. They think they are superior. But they are the ones wearing the button that says “Ask me about our new Breakfast egg burger”. Besides, I am entitled to order a coke with no ice without the chick behind the counter giving me attitude!

Shops on Hindley street – They are all way cool. Especially the shop that sells shoes, with a name that is blatantly racist, but spelled differently. Hehehe.

Tonight I am going to the Adelaide "Carols By Candlelight". Lots of people are being wet blankets and saying that it is too hot! Its only 36 degrees!

Wow, a whole day without a blog entry. I bet you all thought I was dead! But no, still warm the blood that courses through these veins. Went to Nic’s last night, we all sat round and played exciting board games and card games. Scruples is the funnest game ever. Basically you get a card that says Yes, no or depends, and five cards with ethical and moral questions on them, you have to choose whom to ask the question to in order to get the answer that is on your card. For example, If my questions says “you owe $4000 dollars on a student loan, however you move house and the bank fails to find you, do you still repay the loan?” and I think, gee, Daw is an honest person, I think he will say yes, and my card says yes, so if I ask daw and he does say yes, I get to get rid of that question card. If he says No however, I can challenge him and argue that he would. Then the other players vote to see who is right. It’s a fun ass game

Hey kids, a little note for you in case you wondered what I am like as a drunk.

You're a Philosophical Drunk!
"Imagine, right, imagine the part of you that was you when you're speaking to me, isn't you, but that the you that's yu when that's happening, the real you is the you that ... Shit, what was I saying? It's all about society, isn't it? Morality's just ... What?"
Declare your existential thinking with the following axiom:

What kind of drunk are you?

“I'm a motherfucker on a motorcycle, Yeah, She’s a mother fucker on a motorcycle”

Mutha Fukka on a motorcycle – Machine Gun Fellatio

I’m not stating that all motorcyclists are motherfuckers, but the cyclist who almost caused a high-speed accident involving my car certainly is. It was just after dusk, and I'm driving along at about 86 Kilometers per hour on a single lane road. I'm just about to go over the crest of a hill when this asshole on a motorbike comes past me doing at least 100. Joke was on him. I didn’t laugh. Neither did the four wheel drive that was coming over the crest. Anyway, this cyclist shat themselves, then swerved in front of me. I slam my brakes on. The four-wheel drive does likewise and then hits his horn. The cyclist however, shits themselves again as they almost lose it completely into the scrub, manages to get control again and zooms off again.
Assholes, I'm surrounded by assholes

Nine planets round the sun
Only one does the sun embrace
Upon this watered one
So much we take for granted

So let us sleep outside tonight
Lay down in our mother's arms
For here we can rest safely

If green should turn to grey
But our hearts still bloody be
And if the mountains crumble away
And the river dry
Would it stop the stepping feet

Oh let us sleep outside tonight
Lay down in our mother's arms
For here we can rest safely

Take all that we can get
When it's done
Nobody left to bury here
Nobody left to dig the holes
And here we can rest safely

One sweet world
Around this star is spinning
One sweet world
And in her breath I'm swimming
And here I will rest in peace

So let us sleep outside tonight
Lay down in our mothers arms
For here we can rest safely

-One Sweet World, Dave Matthews Band

This one goes out to Hannah. It really is one sweet world, don't be sad about it love.

Just got back from seeing Bond, Two things come up.
1) I want a spy car that can disappear, drive up walls and shoot rockets etc. Could really help me with my road rage, and as a bonus noone would ever try to clean my windscreen again, specially with two shotguns at the front. So, Christmas is coming up, as is my birthday. . . Hint hint.
2) Is it possible that they can go for number 21 and cram more dry British wit and sexual innuendo into a 2 hour movie?

Today I was so bored I decided that cleaning my room was a good idea.. .
Here’s a list of cool stuff I found.
- $7.45 in change, Mostly five and ten cent pieces, three fifty cent coins, eight twenties and a one dollar coin.

- A bible, written in Ukrainian, With a handwritten Ukrainian message in the front that says “To Dear Nicholas, Love Grandma”

-Four guitar picks, including my long lost favourite with the mad clown design

-A stack of used bus tickets six centimeters thick

-TWENTY BUCKS! It was closed inside an old Koontz book that I haven’t read in ages

-My Grandpa’s ancient harmonica, He bought it in Tokyo during the Korean war, Gave it to dad before he died, dad gave it to me.

-Two bowls, a dinner plate, three glasses, two mugs, five teaspoons, a knife and fork and a saucer with fossilized chocolate cake crumbs on it.

-A note, written by someone on the back of a Chemistry worksheet that reads “Dear Nick, you are very sweet”

-A stack of ticket stubs for movies and other events I have been to the last two years. 32 movie tickets (@$11 a piece comes out to $352). A concert ticket for “28 Days and special guests” at the Tivoli ($25), Two cricket tickets, The orange test series, Australia VS South Africa ($17.65) and the ING cup, Southern Redbacks VS NSW Blues ($10) and a football ticket, Port Adelaide VS Sydney @ Football park during the Ansett Cup (proly about $7) and a ticket to Australia VS Ireland for the International Rules, ($2.75). So in tickets alone I have spent $414.40 in under 2 years.

-A ornately carved tiny handgun key chain that has a fold out blade, Dad confiscated it from a Reception who was trying to stab someone with it. I use it to clean my fingernails

-A funky set of Garfield golf balls still in their original box

-The seat of the old bike I was going to fix up and sell but never got round to

-A pair of possum fur nipple warmers that Ty brought me back from New Zealand, that I lost after I took them off the door of my locker because of a pending sexual harassment lawsuit

-My WBLA (Writing Based Literacy Assessment), A requirement for SACE that my homeroom teacher made me do, even though I am an IB student.

-A tin mug, which has something dark and smelly that I can only assume used to be coffee caked onto the bottom

-Two Videos, One that I made about my family for the IB MYP project, and one that I made with a group of people back in Year Eight about the problems with drugs. Both hilariously funny.

-A whole set of old guitar strings.

-A hand written note, that says “Once bread becomes toast, it can never go back to being bread.” Very profound.

-A poem Julia wrote about me in Year Ten. that says “ Nick is a brick and he kicks chickens and also postmen. Because Lucas buys mucus and he eats snails when he’s reading his mail and also quails. His mouse is grouse like a louse that lives in a nice house. And also Nicky is a flicky.”

-An R2D2 action figure from back when Star Wars was cool. It rocks my world.

-A Bloods football promotion sticker that I kept after an agreement with Hannah.

-The old old “Presidents of the United States of America” CD’s, Who were my favourite band for many years until they broke up. Their music is still good.

-A recipe for “Spanish Rice with Ham” with a guitar tab for James Taylor’s “Fire and Rain” scrawled on the back in lead pencil.

-All of my photos!. Which I thought I had lost but turned up in the bottom drawer of my desk. Some of them are way funny.

-The empty wire frames of the glasses I used to wear when I thought looking like a nerd was funny. Then God got me back by screwing my vision so I actually have to wear glasses.

Cleaning becomes a lot more fun when there are cool memories attached to the stuff you find. This also made me realise how much cool crap is hidden in my room. Go do some cleaning folks. Its lots of fun.

The new bond film “Die Another Day” comes out today. Anyone want to go see it with me? C'mon, one of you out there is bound to be up for some bond-age!

And now ladies and gentlemen, a note on war and terrorism. This is spurred on by the fact that now Australians have to be worried about terrorism because we are an ally to the US. Now this really really irritates me, mainly because we shouldn’t have to jump up every time the US calls on us, and doing it this time got Australia into the shit. Now WE have to worry about walking around outside, and praying that the road doesn’t explode under our feet. Now I'm not saying I hate President Bush, far from it, I think he is a good enough person but he makes some bad choices. As the song goes “War, HUH , good god y’all what is it good for?”. Well the answer is still absolutely nothing my friends, It’s not going to solve anything. My opinion is that Hawkeye Piece from M*A*S*H had it right. What we do is we get all of the American’s and their allies into a room and then bring in all of the terrorists. Then they have a cocktail party, and the last one standing wins. They don’t win anything, They just win, then everyone will go home happy, and we will be able to go outside without worrying about exploding letterboxes and the like.

I'm ALIVE!, Well, sort of. I have been able to prise myself out of bed and walk around without experiencing dizzy spells and I didn’t have to pump myself full of medication. So I am well enough to try and do some work, I STILL have world lit and my English oral to finish, even though they are mostly done. So I will endeavor to return to usual blogging patterns.

Sorry blog fans, due to the fact I have been under the weather of late I have not been blogging as often as I should be. As soon as I nurse myself back to something that resembles health I will resume writing as usual. Right now however I am going to curl up in bed and feel sorry for myself.

You are worth exactly: $2,255,182.00, Hey, I'm pretty pricy. But if you’ve got a spare 2 mill lying around, I seriously recommend buying a Nick. We’re sometimes handy to have around.

At this point I would like to express a note of sorrow for Luke. His pride and joy (his car) was pranged into at a set of lights while he was stationary, and estimates have it that the damage is at worth about $3000 to repair. To the two fools who were attempting to drive behind him, OPEN YOUR EYES.

Update: I got up, pumped myself with antihistamine, paracetemol and water, rugged up nice and warm, and took the life threatening drive to school along the windy hill roads, and what happens? I get forgotten. I sit there in the library talking to Nicola for an hour and a bit, feeling like shit. Then we ring Mrs. Robertson from the office only to find out that she is still at home. So we sit for another 40 or so minutes. Then she tells me that she didn't get my email, and I should send it again. So I drive all the way back home. This means that I will probably have to go in again!

Today, I am in pain. It seems whatever illness I was feeling yesterday has manifested itself into some sort of Uber virus. I went to bed at 6pm, to try and get over it, only to wake up at 2 am and lie there shivering for a good two hours, unable to sleep, just tossing and turning, feeling cold. So I finally haul myself out of bed, put on some track pants and socks, and return, only to find that I’m now too hot to sleep. So I doze fitfully, hallucinating until 8 am when I have to drive mum to work. Driving while dizzy is NOT advised, seeing as I almost died. Then I peel out on the couch and doze for another few hours till I come in here and decide to bitch about how bad I am feeling. Everything hurts. Absolutely everything. I blink and the muscles of my eyes hurt. Just typing this is like murder on the muscles of my fingers. Why am I bitching so much you ask? Because I have to go back into school in about an hour! Yay!
I think I might just blow it off and go to bed.

On a lighter note. You know someone is cool when you can have a conversation like this the second time you talk to them.
Either that or you know that they are as insane as you are.

Snowman: says: how is?
The Pinstripes says: oh question mark is pretty cool last time I talked to him
Snowman says: really?he was pretty down when i spoke to him last, ! wasnt talking to him and he was having marriage difficulties with &. But its good to hear he's better
The Pinstripes says: well thats good, I heard they just gave birth to a little %
Snowman says: awww how cute, ? and & should be so proud!
The Pinstripes says: yeah they were
Snowman says: wow. last time i spoke to $ she and # were expecting a ^
The Pinstripes says: really cool, thats pretty good news, I heard $ I heard she had a little dish on the side with some * dude
Snowman says: oooh, thats not nice.
Snowman says: * is a little bastard tho, i heard he had a fling with { and } while @ was in the next room!
The Pinstripes says: I wonder whose ^ it really is
The Pinstripes says: really what a bastard
The Pinstripes says: we should bash him
Snowman says: i guess we will see when it is born. depends if ^ looks like $ or *.
Snowman says: we really should, but he's a slippery bastard.
The Pinstripes says: bloody prick

Today I feel ill. I have a sore throat, Sore eyes. Sore head. My brain feels burnt; the remainder of my head feels like someone has jammed cotton wool into my ears. My nose is blocked. It feels like I have a cold. Yet outside the sun is shining and birds are chirping, mocking me. I must remember to poison the birdbath.

Daw sent this to me, i thought it was funny

Top Ten Signs Your Neighbor Is A Cannibal

10. You see repairmen go in, but you never really see them come out

9. Your name: Lou Levy; recipe on his refrigerator: "Lou Levy Almandine"

8. Lives alone, yet at his garage sale, had men's and women's shoes in most sizes

7. Asks if sailors count as seafood

6. Sues Denny's for false advertising over its so-called "Lumberjack Breakfast"

5. Calls his hot tub "the slow cooker"

4. At Halloween, he always has extremely realistic skeletons on the porch

3. You ask for a beer, he replies, "They're in the fridge next to Steve"

2. Says, "I'm in the mood for a Mexican...I mean Mexican"

1. The "pork shoulder" he serves you is wearing a wristwatch

Today someone muttered something under their breath and then when I asked them what they said they went “Me? Oh, sorry. I was thinking out loud”. I hate to break this to you genius, but you weren’t thinking. You were talking. Thinking out loud is called talking. This got me thinking about the proverbs we have and how a whole pile of them really do not make sense to ANYONE. Calling something an “Old wives tale” is common, but have you tried telling that to an old wife? It’s a really easy way to get the imprint of a handbag, saucepan or hand across your face. To be “dog tired” is to be very very tired. I don’t know about you people, but my dog rarely runs out of energy, He keeps me up till the wee hours chewing on stuff and yapping and then wakes me up real early so he can go out. Another dog one is “done up like a dogs dinner”. Have these people ever seen a dogs dinner? Do you know what a dogs dinner consists of? My dogs dinner looks like someone ate dinner, then half crapped and half yakked it back into the bowl. That doesn’t sound too well presented. People who are told they are “done up like a dogs dinner” should be offended, I would be, I don’t take kindly to people saying I look like a bowl of crap. To do something “until the cows come home”. I don’t have a cow, I don’t know when it is they come home, in my experience, cows don’t do very much, whenever I see them they are all standing around in a field chewing their cud and looking ignorant. They never seem to be on their way home. To scream blue murder. Now THIS is something I would like to see, does this mean the screaming about the assassination of a colour? Or the yelling at the killing of someone painted blue? Or wailing while murdering someone with red hair? I don’t get it! Please explain! “If you play with fire, you’re going to get burned” WELL DUH! If you play with fire you’re hardly going to get wet now are you? Crying over spilt milk? When I spill milk, I wipe it up. To stand there crying over it is just insane, it really makes me wonder where this one came from. I’ll bet there was some British nancy boy who cried over everything, such a spilling milk, that would be funny. And now various pearls of wisdom from the back of bus tickets. “Pleasant thoughts make pleasant lives” Unless of course you are evil, like cris and matty boy, then pleasant thoughts make for unpleasant lives, because being pleasant to anyone would cause you severe distress. “What really matters is what happens within us, not to us.” What, like digestion? I’ll remember to poison you as oppose to shooting you.
Proverbs need to make sense.

Now I am in more of a mood to make some profound observations with regards to my life, the first being…
Should I be worried if I can watch an episode of Dawson’s creek, and relate to it? Because I find it really alarming, I didn’t think that the writing was that good. I'm fairly convinced I have a writer from the show following me around and taking notes, I must look out for him . . .
Anyway, I'm trying to make the point that TV is stupid. If aliens came to earth today at watched some TV they would be so disgusted that they would lay waste to our planet in the ad break. Nothing that happens on TV is a reflection of real life, nothing! You find one thing, I challenge you. Here you come with “But nick, the news is real life!”, well yes, that’s true, but look at some of the things on NEWS and current affairs programs now days. Every second week current affairs programs run exposes on shonky business people who run from the camera, every other week they have a battle between neighbors and they fill in the empty space with segments like “How to live on two dollars a day” or “how to lose weight fast”. I could tell you how to do both in 2 minutes. Its real simple.
1) Buy a big roll of duct tape with your two dollars.
2) Tape your mouth shut so you can’t eat anything.
3) Sit and stare at the walls.
And there you go, you will lose weight and you can accumulate your money and use it to buy booze or something. If however you still want to eat, I recommend my new diet, I call it the anaconda diet, the way it works is on the first day of every month you eat a whole water buffalo then you do nothing but digest that for the rest of the month. Waste of my time current affairs programs. The news, for what it gives us in updates of the current events they sure include a lot of witness testimonies. A story about a car accident?. You always have some loser being interviewed saying things like
“MY god man, I seen it, he comes screaming round this corner here right, and like talking on his phone and shit, and I say to my friend jimmy here I say, “mate, he is going to fuck hisself up one day.” And then that crazy mo fo does, he wipes out into that tree there. And jimmy was like, holy fuck!”
I tell you what, if these people got off the streets, stopped looking at car accidents and got a job, the world would be a lot better for everyone. Other than that I find the news way too depressing for anyone to watch. All it does is remind us of how fucked up our world is, War, terrorism, death, disease, famine, all we need is four horsemen and we’re somewhere close to the apocalypse. I for one do not want to see that happen. Lift your game world. Anyone reading this right now, I want you to get up, go out , find 5 people you don’t know and tell them you love them.
Sounds like a nice thing to do doesn’t it? But by the fourth person, you will have four people out to kill you for some reason. People don’t respond well to love anymore. *sigh*

I find many things distressing, at this point I find it distressing that Microsoft Corporation has divided the English language into several different sub categories. Last I checked, English was mostly the same language, and there is no such language as "US English"
More distressing is the fact that the "Australian English" dictionary doesn't contain words like "Aussie" and "Bludger".
Think Microsoft! if you're going to split up the language, at least include vital parts of "Australian English" into the bloody "Australian English" dictionary!

She said I don't know if I've ever been good enough.
I'm a little bit rusty, and I think my head is caving in,
And I don't know if I've ever been really loved,
By a hand that's touched me,
And I feel like something's gonna give,
And I'm a little bit angry.
Well, this ain't over, no, not here,
Not while I still need you around.
You don't owe me, we might change,
Yeah, we just might feel good.

I wanna push you around,
Well, I will,
Well, I will,
I wanna push you down,
Well, I will,
Well, I will,
I wanna take you for granted,
I wanna take you for granted,
Yeah, yeah, well, I will.

She said I don't know why you ever would lie to me,
Like I'm a little untrusting,
When I think that the truth is gonna hurt ya,
And I don't know why you couldn't just stay with me.
You couldn't stand to be near me,
When my face don't seem to want to shame,
'Cause it's a little bit dirty.
Well, don't just stand there, say nice things to me,
'Cause I've been cheated, I've been wronged,
And you, you don't know me,
Yeah, well, I can't change.
I won't do anything at all.

-Matchbox Twenty "Push"

I don't really know why I published this set of lyrics. It's a good song, and it always moves me. The first verse sums up just about how I'm feeling right now too.

Ok, I promised Julia this, but she was paro, so I don’t know if she will remember making me promise her, but here goes. . .
Lets set the scene. To see hell would be frightening. To visit hell, terrifying, to visit a hell on earth is petrifying. This was the scene at the bay, hell on earth. The night was all wrong to begin with. I was in a shitty shitty mood, really not up for any kind of party, but I went. With a total solar eclipse occurring in the background, people were bound to be in a weird mood. Anyway, I rocked up. Walked in, spoke to a few people, who muttered to me briefly in voices laced with liquor and beer. I left for a while, meandered along the beach lost in thought, then returned. Look in your dictionary, to define claustrophobia there was a picture of this place. In the time that I was gone, gatecrashers had rocked up, and not just gatecrashers LOTS of gatecrashers. The hostess wailed over the din, attempting to crowd people into the house, out of the dry zone. They took her advice, walking room was minimal, the place was packed, the corridor took about 10 minutes to walk end to end, and it was only about 10 meters long. At some point I glanced down the stairs. Had someone added digital flames, hell couldn’t have looked any scarier. The sour stench of cigarette smoke, laced with pot smoke, laced with the smell of spilt beer wafted up at me. Leering faces of people I didn’t even know gazed up at me, eyes glazed, lost in their own little dream world. For every invited person I saw in the house, I saw 10 people I didn’t know, and nobody else did either. A kid from my school stood at the door, frantically trying to keep people in or out using a password system. However the words “Sex” and “vagina” to let people in and out respectively really didn’t work. I lost a few people I really needed to talk to, so I trooped back in. this time, I descended into the belly of the beast. It was about this point that I ran into Julia. She gave me a hug, told me she loved me and made me promise to blog about it in the morning. So here we are. I blogged, I'm sure you don’t remember, considering that you told me to do it at least twice throughout the night. But anyway.
I stood on the street after speaking with Julia. The crowd that had gathered would no longer fit in the house, word had spread fast, and now a crowd of at least 50 people were milling about on the street, calling more friends and telling them to come down. I left after I saw a man downstairs punch through a window. Although it was probably a good move, letting the smoke out so everyone didn’t asphyxiate but this was not a place I wanted to hang around in. I found out later that my judgment served me well. About 20 minutes after I left, someone used wood that they had kicked from the banister and the walls to start a fire downstairs. Among broken glass from windows and bottles and smoke people got out, some people got hurt. Police, fire crews and paramedics attended the scene and it all made the evening news. The moral of the story kids? Open invite parties, not a good idea, specially if its an area prone to unsavory types wandering round.

One really saddening aspect to this whole thing was, that at about 7:30, I looked in the apartment next door through the window, and saw the normality of an elderly couple sitting down to dinner. They didn’t need that. They were probably scared shitless by the goings on not 2 meters away from their house. Its sad.

Well, life is somewhat back to normal, the last few days have been somewhat stressful, but even in the height of stress I didn’t miss a day. That is dedication readers. Thankyou thankyou.
I had to go back into school today. Noone but the teachers were in. I got hassled about having to be back and working.
Finding topics for the Extended essay and what not. As I drove away from school I saw the entire body of staff walking back to the school from their mass up the road, and I thought, “so tempting, so very tempting”. But that would damage my car, and I don’t want that… yet.

It's nice to know that my friends travel prepared, like dutchy here
Dutchy :"I slept quite a bit during this flight, although suddenly i woke up, the voice-over anounced that "there is an emergency". Reaching down my pocket I felt the cold and comforting feel of my Berreta .45. I realised that i wasnt going to allow anyone to hijack this plane"

not so comforting that dutchy can get a firearm through airport security. THAT should worry the hell out of everyone. .
But dont stress too much .
Dutchy: "they needed a doctor in the economy class...obviously some old dude fainted and my dad jumped up and helped the fella. Hmm, no action for me... "

phew.

Two words i really hate right now are "what" and "if" especially if they are combined into the phrase "what if". This one two word phrase is one of the most powerful combinations of words in the language, if you think about it.

Man, Julia and I have some fun conversations, last night for example
Snowman: says:
Do you know what i just realized?
The word "boob" is incredibly un-sexy and un-romantic.
Julia says:
hahahahaahhaha that is sooooo true
Julia says:
we'll come up with a new sexy word
Snowman says:
think ill stick to breasts for the time being.
Snowman says:
and while I’m doing that ill think about what i can call them .
Julia says:
ok
Julia says:
adn in the mean time ill call them hogopbos

and then later on …

Snowman says:
i just realized that I haven’t actually seen you in ages, and I’ve been the biggest little nerd lately, not happy
Julia says:
hehehe i bet you miss me heaps don’t you dear I can tell
Snowman says:
yes, withdrawal symptoms and all that.
Snowman says:
waking up in a cold sweat screaming your name.
Snowman: says:
all the usual
Julia says:
sigh. i cant deny the drug-like effect I have on others. its a curse really being this irresistible
Snowman: says:
yes, i can see how it would be a problem
Snowman says:
they need to come up with a Julia patch.
Snowman: says:
you can put it on and have the effects of julia, then gradually decrease the dosage till you are julia free
Julia says:
Ahhahah, ill make you one
Julia says:
well i wouldnt want that to happen. i don’t like you when you are Julia free
Julia says:
cos then you aren’t there so your not much use
Snowman: says:
Hey, have you ever seen me Julia free?

Hehehehe, Julia is fun, gotta love that kid.

Hey! I'm almost halfway through my TOK essay! yay! im on some kind of roll!

Today, due to extreme boredom I decided to make a start on my TOK essay, as once that and the TOK oral are finished I never have to do TOK ever again. So here we go, I'm 50 words in and feeling pretty damn good about the whole thing.

Generally speaking, once a day I see a person and I think, “damn,, we would be doing the planet and the human race a favor if we completely obliterated that person and anyone else like them so that they never procreate and give way to offspring like them. Today this class of person is smokers.
Now smokers in general shit me, however I find most of them tolerable, I know plenty of nice people who smoke. I have no problems at all with those people who smoke away in private, in the comfort of their own home or backyard. My problem is with two main classes of smoker.

1) the type of smoker, usually teenagers who stand around in public all puffing away at their little cancer sticks and blowing the smoke around to pollute my air. Fine, kill yourself asshole, that’s suicide, but blow smoke in my face it becomes homocide. Its not only that they are slowly killing innocent people and themselves by buying their cancer by the boxful and smoking it in public, but the fact that they think they are heaps “cool” and hardcore for doing it! Ok, given that today’s teens think that they are invincible, and therefore take huge risks like driving too fast, drinking to excess and smoking, however, how screwed up is a system where killing yourself slowly is defined as cool? You might as well suck on the exhaust of my car, that would make you super cool, and would probably be a fuckload better for you than the shit they put in cigarettes. Or even better, go home and pull the shotgun trigger with your toe, smearing your brains across the room. This would be faster, cheaper (at the price of one shotgun shell as oppose to packets upon packets of damn cancer sticks) and would be doing the world a favour to ensure that your unique smoky genetic code would never be passed on. Also, if killing yourself makes you cool, by definition, you would then be the coolest motherfucker to ever walk the earth. Grrrr, makes me mad having to watch people throw their lives away like that in order to gain the acceptance of their peers.
2) The second class of smoker that I hate, but laugh at every time I see them due to the irony of their situations is the smoking drivers. These people who happily cruise around in their cars, puffing away contentedly. Now, the killer in this situation is that a majority of these people have their window wound down so that they don’t have to inhale the foul smelling smoke that they exhale after taking a puff! So what’s the logical thing to do? I know! Wind down you window! That way you don’t have to breathe the shit in, and you get to pollute the fucking atmosphere at the same time! Good deal! Seriously though, if you want to smoke and drive, fine, just leave your windows rolled up so that it doesn’t pollute my air. Feel free to cruise around in these little gas chambers until such a time that you hack up your old and tar covered lungs at the ripe old age of 30 odd.

I think I’ve bitched enough here. But smokers really do shit me.

Dear God,
I am writing to inform you of my dissatisfaction with the life I have been issued. It is entirely too boring, and fraught with people who irritate me. I am constantly dealing with fools and idiots, like debt collectors who want me to pay 400 dollars in late fees, People who turn without indicating, counter help that ask me pointless bloody questions. May I ask that you deal with these people promptly or issue me with a full refund or new life? I trust that the matter will be resolved sharpish

Sincerely,
Nick J Lucas

Dear Mr Lucas,
I regret to inform you that all sales are final, and you cannot be reissued with a life until the complete and utter finalization of your current life. So it looks like now you will be forced to suffer through all of the crazy bullshit that I put you through until such a time that it is feasible for you to die. Ner ner ner ner ner ner. We apologize for any problems that this may cause you and would ask that any further complaints or queries that you would like to address be forwarded to my office so I can remind you that I have the power to fuck you around.

Regards,
God.

Nicks personality, or lack thereof.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Very High
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	Moderate
Antisocial:	High
Borderline:	Moderate
Histrionic:	Very High
Narcissistic:	High
Avoidant:	Moderate
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Click Here To Take The Test --

That presents kind of a grim forecast for the future in my opinion.

I am at home and very bored after my interview at school. Therefore I blog lots. There is some kind of logic there.
So here you are kids, a couple of lists

THINGS THAT NICK LOVES TODAY
1) His dog, Zak, who is at present attempting to maul his left foot.
2) Rocking guitar solos that you can play good air guitar to.
3) Nirvana’s song – you know you’re right
4) Chocolate Meringues
5) Good coffee, lots of milk,. Plenty of sugar
6) Powderfinger, for having such good music
7) Photo’s of Friends, because they are usually crazy
8) His glasses, for giving him sight, depth of perception and the ability to look intelligent to those who don’t know him
9) Big soft leather swivel chairs. For being comfy as well as cool to spin in and making him feel like a james bond villain,
10) Getting mail, Email and Snail mail.
11) Being thought smart enough to get an academic award (Even though I should have got one semester one)
12) His guitar, for being a creative outlet, AND really cool to boot.

THINGS THAT NICK IS NOT SO FOND OF TODAY.
1) His school, for making him take a 50 minute round trip for a 5 minute interview.
2) McDonalds, for not serving fries. What is the deal? Since when do Mc Donalds not serve fries? Its not that difficult, mash a potato, mix it with newspaper, cut them into strips, fry the fuckers, salt them and sell them to me! None of this “I'm sorry, today we can’t do fries” bullshit.
3) Alex Lloyd for not letting the world call him lloydie.
4) Life, for apparently screwing him at every turn.
5) His car for being a worthless lump of squeaky stally shit.
6) The Onkaparinga council for wanting me to pay over four hundred dollars for books I haven’t returned.
7) The laws of physics, For being so damn constant
8) Australian Poetry, Especially Dawe, mainly because I was up till two last night writing my IB oral.
9) World Lit Essays. For being world lit essays.
10) The IBO in general, for making me pay money for new texts!
11) Shoes, for not supporting my right to bare feet.

THINGS NICK IS GOING TO DO OVER THE SUMMER HOLIDAYS.
1) Get crazy drunk with all my friends and have lots of fun.
2) Go and see “The ring” and ascertain if it really is as scary as everyone says.
3) Go to the movies again and see “Lord of the rings”, “Die another day” and any other crazy films that take my fancy
4) Buy a digital camera to take lots of photos of people and not have to pay inflated development costs.
5) Go shooting on the farm.
6) Write his TOK Oral and Essay,
7) Write his extended essay.
8) Cry because he had to do work in the holidays
9) Go surfing, and have much fun
10) Prove to daw that going the “Double mondi” is impossible

Just signing on again to tell you all that out of all of the super mario characters, I am yoshi!

I am a hip critter. I showed up fasionably late with Super Mario World and have started launching your own career since then. In maybe 10-15 years, my popularity will rival Mario's. Not that I'm competing with him. He's my bud. I'm good at getting and keeping friends, and they value me for that. After all, who else would carry them on their back through ice, fire, and rain? Sometimes I think I'm taken for granted, but I know that my friends have my back. Of course they do. Who would screw over Yoshi?

Yay!, this means people wont be as offended now when i ask them if i can slip them the tounge!

December 2, 2002
Today I hauled my ugly ass allllll the way to school (Which is a 20 minute drive), they keep me there for a 10 minute interview and then tell me to go home. Sigh. Also a note for the unskilled drivers, attempting to drive with a puppy on your lap, a cheeseburger in one hand and a coke in the other while you steer with your knees is not really a good idea if you want to live. Just letting you all know. ..

Lets see what’s in Nicks mail for today!. We have a letter from my school, official looking nice Mercedes letterhead, and voila! Nick has qualified for an academic award because he is such a nerd! Yay! Just what I needed, something else for the SACE students to use against me when we say that IBers aren’t super smart.
And what else, a letter from the council, the library as it were, transcript as follows.

Dear Mr Lucas,
Our records show that the item(s) listed below are now very overdue. Please return the immediately or pay the replacement charges as listed below (including 10% GST). Your borrowing privileges have been suspended until the issue is resolved. IF you have returned or paid for any of the items after the date of this invoice, please contact the library to resolve the matter.

AF KOO D Tick Tock, Lost materials charge +GST : $22.00
AF K828/17 The Mask. Lost materials charge +GST: $66.00
ANF 817.08/7: 5000 one liners: Lost materials charge +GST: $19.25
AA0 AAO 1627: 999: New stories of horror Lost materials charge +GST: $18.04
ANF 491.7 LP Russian for Travelers Lost materials charge +GST: $22.00
CANFhs 363.25 The New Encyclopedia of forensic Science Lost materials charge +GST: $65.84
AF KOO D Strange Highways Lost materials charge +GST: $22.00
ANF 828.913 The Log Lost materials charge +GST: $27.50
ANF 791.4572 I want to believe: The X-files Compendium Lost materials charge +GST: $27.50
ANF 829.708 The penguin book of Aussie Jokes Lost materials charge +GST: $22.00
EPBK Crim Messiah Lost materials charge +GST: $16.50
ANF 829.568 Dirty Jokes and Beer Lost materials charge +GST:$25.50
CANFhs 364.32 The perfect murder Lost materials charge +GST:$ 32.00
CANFhs 364.98 Inside the mind of a killer Lost materials charge +GST:$ 44.90

Outstanding Balance Incl. GST = $430.63

Regards,
City of Onkaparinga council.

Hmmm, maybe I should return those library books before the council comes around and tries to extract their money through body parts. Shows how long its been since I went to the library ..

December 1, 2002
On this day, years ago, two separate fathers paced two separate delivery rooms in two different parts of the world. Two teams of doctors stood around coaching two mothers, guiding them as to what they should be doing. Two older brothers waited, ready to be amazed with the wonderment of new life. Two sets of family members waited, anxiously for news, some pacing, some trying to watch TV, others murmuring to each other softly about whatever sprung to mind, Names were discussed, some loudly and overtly, others not so loudly “How about they name it after…?” “Wouldn’t it be nice if…”. Outside the world kept turning, People with bad hair, wearing bad clothes hurried around, Politicians yelled at each other, Police officers directed traffic, window cleaners dipped their squeegees and carried out their daily tasks, it was just another day. In amongst the chaos, two lives were thrust forth into the world. Bottoms smacked, these two separate babies, one male, one female were wrapped and handed to their parents. Tears were shed, relieved sighs breathed. The children were laid in small cribs, blissfully ignorant to the world around them.
Seventeen years on, plenty has changed. Now these two children are a part of the hectic life, and loving every minute of it. Days are filled with sports, study, life and love. I daresay seventeen years from now, the two will look back, and reflect on how young they were, how good they looked, and how silly hairstyles were, but regardless, by then, both of them will have excelled in whatever it is they put their mind to. Happy Birthday Sean Howie and Julia Canny, 17 today. Have a good one guys.

November 30, 2002.
I still have more work to do. I'm just not dedicated enough I guess. What with this damn dog attacking my shoes its hard to concentrate. Dad makes the point that the mutt is just like me, all it does is eats, sleeps, pisses, pukes and scratches itself. He makes a strong case. World lit is going to kill me, this oral is too. Grrr. I'm kinda mad with the whole ib work thing. So I did some more writing for IBimperium.

I also found out today what googlism thought of me. Googlism is basically a site that searches the google seargh engine for references that you appoint, say a name or place, and then publishes a list of entries that start with (your entry) is . . . . .
Here’s what we came up with for a search with my name. (The original results were too long, so this list is abbreviated.)

nick is sexy
nick is my boyfriend
nick is gone
nick is a master
nick is one of the newest additions to the
nick is a bitch at the new nubian nation
nick is awesome bo bawesome
nick is boooootylicious
nick is on his way
nick is pissed
nick is watching you
nick is dressed for the cold
nick is da man
nick is sooo cute
nick is the one
nick is beelzebub's bastard
nick is a generous performer
nick is a babe
nick is an idiot
nick is being unfaithful
nick is funny
nick is one of the newest additions to the hive
nick is a bitch
nick is the bomb
nick is a character
nick is a mild
nick is really the sexiest and the hottest guy in the world
nick is irreplaceable
nick is a scheming toad
nick is a real flamer
nick is fine i love him
nick is special and i don’t mean in that just in the golfing sense
nick is entitled to be a little arrogant
nick is four episodes away from the complete end of the series
nick is seconded to the newly created c squad of the fraud squad
nick is interested in ceramics and pyrography
nick is not one of us
nick is originally from dallas
nick is innocent

Hmm, that was kind of exciting. I never knew I was originally from dallas!

Don't eat the yellow snow

Tuesday, December 31, 2002

Monday, December 30, 2002

Thursday, December 26, 2002

Wednesday, December 25, 2002

Tuesday, December 24, 2002

Monday, December 23, 2002

Sunday, December 22, 2002

Saturday, December 21, 2002

Friday, December 20, 2002

Thursday, December 19, 2002

Wednesday, December 18, 2002

Tuesday, December 17, 2002

Monday, December 16, 2002

Sunday, December 15, 2002

Friday, December 13, 2002

Thursday, December 12, 2002

Wednesday, December 11, 2002

Tuesday, December 10, 2002

Monday, December 09, 2002

Sunday, December 08, 2002

Saturday, December 07, 2002

Friday, December 06, 2002

Thursday, December 05, 2002

Wednesday, December 04, 2002

Tuesday, December 03, 2002

Monday, December 02, 2002

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